Do you think I have genuine feelings for this guy?

Okay so in drama I have to act as a girl in love with a guy for a play we’re doing but when we’re acting I feel like I don’t need too? I can’t tell whether I’m just in my character or if I have genuine feelings for him? Can anyone help?

Well, I myself am an actor and occasionally find myself in such circumstances where I need to try to figure out whether or not I’m playing a part…or if the part is playing me! Just kidding. Parts rarely play people because that doesn’t make sense and I have a certificate here signed by several authorities which states that I no longer believe things that don’t make sense.Over the years, I have compiled a checklist of things to look for in order to determine the realness of what I’m feeling (as a self proclaimed advicist, I retain the right to make up any words that I want to make up…such as ‘realness’).
1. When you follow him home at night and break into his room, how long do you stand there smelling his hair whilst he sleeps? Is it more than 4 hours?
2. When acting out your scenes, and the director tells you it is time to cut, do you find you are throwing yourself bodily at the director and punching his stupid face for ruining the moment?
3. Have you etched his name into your flesh with a coat hanger somewhere that is visible?
4. During the course of a scene, do you shove other people off the stage when they come close to him, even if it isn’t scripted that you do so?If you’ve answered yes to at least three of the questions above, then it is truly real love that you are experiencing and not just fake actor love. In the event that it is real love, really the only rational course of action is to hound him every moment of the day until he realizes he loves you just as much. Sometimes, this requires purchasing a windowless van. Or getting his name tattooed on your hip.

Hope that helps!

Because this type of thing can easily drift into gray areas, I think, rather than try to determine whether or not you have feelings FOR the guy, you should attempt to have feelings OF the guy.This is an endeavor that is much easier to gauge. You will always be able to tell if you have feelings OF a guy.Here’s how to do this. (You can trust me, I feel people up all the time. And most of the time they don’t even know it.)

Whenever you are working with him in a scene, perform all of your blocking very close to him. In fact, just ignore your blocking and stand next to him at all times. You are very likely to touch him, and he you. This will give you more immediate gratification than waiting for him to reciprocate any emotional feelings.

When you enter a room where he already is, sit next to him, only, in your mind, visualize that there is already someone seated next to him so you have to squish in between them, very close to him. Very. Close. It’s even better to try to wait for someone else to actually sit next to him so you don’t have to do the visualization…just the squishing in.

If he enters a room where you already are and comes to sit next to you, quickly, as imperceptibly as possible, put your hand out over the seat he’s about to take so his butt lands on your hand. This is a classic trick that works every time. I get lots of butt action this way.

Constantly be removing phantom things from his hair or batting bugs off of his physical person. “Oh, you had a wasp on your neck. I saved you.” This is always a very socially acceptable reason for touching someone.

Make sure you never laugh at a single joke unless you touch his arm at the same time. Jokes are only funny if arms are being grazed. This is what I have learned from hanging out in singles’ bars.

Bump into him a lot. Klutzy is cute and a convenient way of copping secret, thrilling feels.

Become a hugger. Everyone likes getting hugs. And everyone loves a hugger. There’s nothing like a hug for getting right up on someone.

You get the drift here. You seem like a creative person, being involved in the theatre and all, so I bet you can come up with your own ways of having feelings OF this guy.

At the end of the day, when you have feelings FOR someone, eventually you just have to commit yourself to having those feelings for just the one person, which can get old. When you have feelings OF someone, well, you can keep having feelings OF that someone and also get a lot of feelings of other “someone”s at the same time. There’s no need to tie yourself to having feelings OF just one person.

You will have a lot more fun and be way less confused.

All the best!


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