just noticed i catch her eyes looking at me quite a bit every time we go to class, idk if its just random or if its me looking at her or
what..But we do make eye contact quite a bit but never speak.
Sean:
You see, when you started staring at her, she may not even have noticed you at all. As your classes went on, she started noticing your gaze burning into the back of her head. She knew she was being watched like a yearling gazelle by a hungry cheetah, and it inspired feelings in her that she never knew she had. Now before you get all excited, you need to realize what it is you’re dealing with here. This doesn’t mean you should go walk up and say hi, or offer to buy her lunch. It doesn’t mean you’ve got a shot at taking her to a school dance or your friend’s keg party. You, my friend, have perfect stalker form and this girl is going crazy for it.
There are a few minor changes you’re going to need to make to your lifestyle if you really want to get her attention. She may seem like a normal, well-adjusted girl making some friendly eye contact across the room, but believe me, she’s testing you. She’s baiting you to see if you’ll crack a sweet smile, repulsing her, or if you’ll lock into a full-on nightmare gaze, sending electric shivers down her spine.
#1: Eye Contact
More. Lots more. You should only ever be taking your eyes off her for important class notes, though it is preferred to copy a friend’s notes after class, as diligently doing schoolwork may tarnish your image as a lurking super-stud. Chewing pencils however, is spot on! Keep your line of sight directly on her at all possible times. When she does look back at you, tense your shoulders up and attempt to twitch your left eyebrow fervently. (Practice in front of a mirror a few times before trying this move out!)
#2: Daily Planning
Let’s face it. As things are right now, you get one, two hours tops with this girl. You may feel like that’s enough but if you want to keep this little lady, you’ve got to be more flexible with your schedule. The hours that she spends outside of this class and away from you are painful for her, believe me. Nothing short of a living hell. Solve this by doing some simple footwork and learning her agenda. Most things should be easy to find out if you steal her day planner, photocopy it and return it to her bag. (Bonus points if you misted it with a hint of your favorite cologne!) This way, you’ll be able to make that same wonderful eye contact from her band practice, friend’s backyard swimming pool, or even from her bedroom closet late at night when she’s being coy and pretending to sleep. Women love a man who can be everywhere at once, and you have the power to make that dream come true.
#3: Wardrobe Choices
If you’re a typical student, you probably wear the same sort of fashions as most of your friends. I don’t blame you at all but if you really want to stand out to her, you’re going to need to invest in a good pair of thick, rainbow suspenders. Not only do they keep your pants up like a dream, but they’ll grab her attention and grip it tighter by the minute. She won’t be able to take her eyes off of you. Then, and only then, you will lean forward, fire up that eyebrow, and calmly mouth the words “You looked like you had fun at the Seether concert last Wednesday.” For best effect, this staggeringly powerful combo should be done while wearing beige-tinted prescription eyeglasses.
Follow this triple-play strategy and you can take things to the next level with this special lady. Girls are people just like you and me, and they want nothing more than to feel the omniscient presence of your undying obsession. Good luck, creep.
Your Stupid Advice 